Wednesday, 21 March 2012

A spring tide

Its been a long time since I asked anyone out on a date, and even longer since I've been on one, I'm fully aware of how this fact broadcasts my incompetence in the chat-up line department.  However sometimes the tide begins to turn, we're not always being washed out to sea, moreover on occasions we're swept inwards riding a tsunami, O.K that might be going over the top but what I'm trying to say is Cindy accepted my offer for a drink, although what I meant by that was drinks, plenty of them, getting totally inhibriated making it much easier for myself to seduce the imbibed back to my place.  It's hardly cunning, and I don't feel like Bond here, I'm pretty sure that in today's society a drink means drinks to everyone, who stops at one?

I have one full day to plan, as the date is Friday night, finally I can be one of these morons who claim to 'get the Friday feeling'  something I've never really understood, more questioned its very existance, I could be wrong though, I'll know on Friday.  As a social retard I have two key problems to address, firstly, where on Earth do I take her? Do I even 'take' her or do we meet? Do I pay? Or do modern day women now find it offensive when a man produces his plastic?  Oh God, this is worse than I thought.  So, secondly, what am I going to talk about?  I'm worried my brain will freeze over like an ice age, and my lips will tighten like a noose.  Not to worry too much, I have a plan, every man should have a plan.  I'll read up on current affairs, buy The Independant, scour the Internet, become fully versed with TV soaps and, most importantly, be knowledgeable on reality TV, I hate it but it's taken over the world.

More updates on this matter to come, hope its not spread like an Australian wildfire around the office yet...


3 comments:

  1. I've never understood the 'friday feeling' either, maybe because most weeks I have to work on Saturdays. When i was younger I was promised the Friday feeling would be amazing, that's what you get for taking the word of Cadbury's Crunchie adverts as gospel i guess.

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  2. Indeed, I suffered the same false marketing from Crunchie, honeycomb wrapped up in chocolate and lies!

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  3. any tips for easing yourself back into essay writing? But quickly! lol

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